Ahhh...the lightbulb joke hits the religion page

How many Charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?
One to change the bulb and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

How many Calvinists does it take to change a light bulb?
None. God has predestined when the light will be on. Calvinists do not change light bulbs. They simply read the instructions and pray the light bulb will be one that has been chosen to be changed.

How many Baptists does it take to change a light bulb?
Change???

How many neo-orthodox does it take to change a light bulb?
No one knows. They can't tell the difference between light and darkness.

How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.

How many independent fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, because any more might result in too much cooperation.

How many liberals does it take to change a light bulb?
At least ten, as they need to hold a debate on whether or not the light bulb exists. Even if they can agree upon the existence of the light bulb, they still might not change it, to keep from alienating those who might use other forms of light.

How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They always use candles.

How many worship leaders who use guitars does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But soon all those around can warm up to its glowing.

How many members of an established Bible teaching church that is over 20 years old does it take to change a light bulb?
One to actually change the bulb, and nine to say how much they liked the old one.

How many United Methodists does it take to change a light bulb?
This statement was issued: "We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that a light bulb works for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship with your light bulb (or light source, or non-dark resource), and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life, and tinted - all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence."

[Currently playing on my IPod: Johnny's Camero by David Wilcox]

Sweatiest cities in the US.

Old Spice has done this ranking for the past 3 years. Dallas came in at lucky #13...
http://www.wftv.com/health/4619160/detail.html

So How's It Going--Really, I Mean It!!!

There is a social awkwardness that seems to dominate the people I meet. You have probably had the same experience--let me explain what I mean.

I am walking down the hall at the gym and I see someone and ask, "How's it going?" To me this is a question...and I must admit I do not want the 30 minute version of their life story; however, I do want an answer. But all too often the other person will respond by asking me the exact same question, "How's it going?" I want to yell, "I asked you first!!!"

I have pondered the reason for this and the only thing I have come up with is that the other person either does not think I care OR they really don't have anything good to talk about.

The other response I get is one that drives me up the wall--especially when it is given by a Christ Follower. Once again I ask, "How's it going," and they respond, "I'm barely making it." This makes me want to throw up.

I have this belief (it actually comes from Scripture) that each and every person on this big ball of dirt called earth was custom designed by God. (I can see it now--God is putting us all together in heaven--maybe in reality show style...and the angels are watching...and the show is called, 'Pimp my hide!")

Sorry--I digressed!

Anyway, I really do believe that each one of us has a purpose in life...and it is not just to see how much oxygen we can consume or how many blisters we can form on our rear ends as a result of sitting around and doing nothing.

Jesus said in John 10:10 that He wanted us to have life--life to the full. I honestly do not think Jesus spilled His blood on the cross so that His followers can walk around and brag about how we are all "barely making it!" And I don't think He sent His Holy Spirit to live inside of us so we can merely survive--He wants us to thrive!

So why do so many people, even Christians, feel like, "if I can just make it through this day...or this week...or this project then I will be ok?" I believe it is because too many of us become passionate about the pursuit of things that are not in line with the purpose for which we were designed.

One of the verses I have been wrestling with lately is Psalm 37:4, it tells us to delight ourselves in the Lord and He will give us the desires of our heart. I have heard that verse nearly all of my Christian life and I believe I am finally beginning to discover what that means...that if I will learn how to continually and completely fall in love with Jesus then He will blow my mind with the full, abundant life that will take me to places that I have never even dreamed.

The problem is that too many people have re-written that verse. To them it may say, "Delight yourself in your career...or your car...or your home...or your kids...or having a dating relationship," you get the picture. So people relentlessly pursue all these things...and because of that they fall out of love with Jesus and merely begin to admire Him from a distance.

And that is why people feel they are "barely making it."

So how are you doing--really? Are you surviving--or thriving? Has there ever been a time that you seriously got alone with God and asked, "OK, you designed me--but for what?" It bothers me that so many people in our country feel trapped in dead end jobs...and the only reason they stay working where they are is because they are dominated by feelings of inferiority and insecurity. So many people I know pursue the career that their parents wanted them to pursue, or their friends--but what about God--what does He want? If you don't discover your purpose then you will always be in survival mode.

One more thing--God wants you to know your purpose more than you want to know it. All too often we think of God's purpose for our lives as this HUGE heavenly secret...and in order to get it we have to read our Bible's, stand on our heads--and read the Prayer of Jabez. But the Bible says that if we delight ourselves in the Lord--continually learn to fall more and more in love with Him--then He will rock our world with His plan.

He didn't create us to survive--He wants us to thrive!!!

[Currently playing on my IPod: All I Need Is You by Hillsong United]

1-800-ASK-KEITH installment #2

If you remember, back in May, I began a new feature to my blog entitled 1-800-ASK-KEITH.
It's meant to be an advice warning to those who may read my blog, that I may never personally come into contact with in my lifetime. So here goes installment #2. These are the people who should have called me first this week:

Katie Holmes-- Please wake up and smell the stench. Tom Cruise is just using you to prove to the world (and himself) that he is something that he is obviously not. Listen to your parents and run away...FAST!

Tom Cruise-- Any sensible person can see you are fabricating/faking/forcing the relationship with Katie. You need to seek professional help, and you need Christ, not L.Ron Hubbard.

Michael Jackson-- Your career is over in the US. You'd better thank your attorney's for saving your freedom, because they can't save your career. David Hasselhoff does great in Germany, maybe you could too?

Phil Jackson-- Why try to rebuild the Lakers when you could have had LeBron?

Is there separation between secular and spiritual?

So I am watching television last night and the next thing I know I am yelling at it. Has that ever happened to you? You are calm and then the next thing you know you feel your blood begin to boil and you are attempting to engage the people on television in some sort of debate! As I said, that happened to me last night and I haven't quite calmed down yet.

So what was I watching? I was watching a rerun of the Beverly Hillbillies and...

Ok, just kidding. I was watching Hannity and Colmes on FOX and they were debating whether or not a person's religious background should influence their political and social outlooks on life. There was a dude on there, I can't remember his name, that said that Christians in this country should learn to separate their religious beliefs from their political beliefs. This infuriated me--and I have to vent!

The truth is that when a person meets Jesus everything changes. Jesus never intended Himself to merely be a "get out of hell free" card. As I have heard it said, He didn't just come to get us out of hell and into heaven--He came to get Himself out of heaven and into us. AND when that happens, literally every aspect of our lives will be effected--not just certain areas.

I was reading John chapter five this morning--which totally goes along with what I am writing about. In John five (actually, throughout the whole book of John) Jesus says that He wants to give us LIFE. He never says, "I want to influence an aspect of your life," or, "I want to be a part of SOME of your life." He says, "I am life!" And so once again, for someone to make a decision to be a follower of Christ means every aspect of our lives are completely surrendered to Him.

This means who we date, how we respond to our spouse, how we raise our kids, how we handle our money--and yes, even how we view the political and social climate of the world we live in. Remember this--Jesus isn't impressed when we throw Him a bone by merely coming to church on Sunday--He desires complete surrender from us 24/7/365.

In a nut shell this is what I am saying...I am tired of people (and the media) trying to convince followers of Jesus that there is a dividing line between the secular and the spiritual. If Jesus lives inside of you then He is not a part of your life--HE IS YOUR LIFE.

The goal of our churches should be to teach this with passion because so many believe otherwise. I do not think we should tell people how to vote or to kick them out if they voted for a particular person; however, I do believe it is the churches responsibility to teach that there should NOT ever be separation between how we live on Sunday and how we operate our lives during the rest of the week.

Remember this--Jesus didn't die a horrible death on a cross so we could merely limit Him to the areas of our lives where we feel as if He can do "the least amount of damage." He died so He could change how we live...and that includes everything--including our political and social agendas.

Just a thought!

On Jackson

Was it just a matter of the immature, naive and decidedly weird looking like they were guilty, or were the jury secretly humming 'Beat it' throughout the deliberations?

Alice Cooper

Below is an excerpt from a very interesting interview of Alice Cooper...

"As for the lifestyle found in some quarters of the rock world, Cooper says, "Drinking beer is easy. Trashing your hotel room is easy. But being a Christian, that's a tough call. That's real rebellion," he told the London Sunday Times Magazine.

In describing the importance of his Christian faith, he says, "It's everything. It's what I live for. If you gave me a choice between rock and roll and my faith, I'd take my faith," Cooper told The Observer in Australia. "Rock and roll is fun—it's what I do for a living. But it's not what I live on. I believe in classic Christianity. I've given my whole life to the Lord. But I don't think that means you can't be a rock and roller." After all, as Cooper has said, "I must be the only father that bangs on the bedroom door and says, 'Turn that music up!'"

[Currently playing on my IPod: Rock DJ by Robbie Williams]

Move forward with fear

This morning I was reading Proverbs 1:7 "The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge." The word for knowledge means wisdom, discernment, understanding, skill or perception. All things that I long for in my life as a worship leader. One of my constant prayers is that God would give me "Leadership Instinct". I define leadership instinct as the wisdom to act in the right way at the right time for the right reason. Solomon says that type of discernment, instinct, wisdom, skill starts with fearing God. Why is that true? Because God is all wise and all knowing. And He shares His mind and heart with those who love and revere Him. So I must move forward with fear... fear of the Lord and He will give me the wisdom I need to be the Leader He has created me to be.

What does the fear of the Lord produce in my life? According to Proverbs fear of the Lord...

Gives me Knowledge 1:7
Gives me Knowledge of God 2:5
Gives me a distaste for evil 8:13
Gives me Wisdom 9:10, 15:33
Adds length to my life 10:27
Aids me in living a righteous lifestyle 14:2
Helps me Avoid evil 14:16, 16:6
It is a fountain of life 14:27; 19:23
Produces an atmosphere of security in my home 14:26
Brings me wealth and honor 22:4
Keeps me from being envioius 23:17
Brings me blessing 28:14

[Currently playing on my IPod: Drifted by Groove Armada]

Illegitimate Jesus

Nowadays it's such a common thing for children to be born to unmarried parents it's no big deal at all, and it would be pretty uncommon that any kids would experience shame or derision because of it, which is a good thing in some ways because a child never deserves to be shamed because of their parents. However one other effect of this is that we may not have an appreciation for the stigma of illegitimacy that Jesus, the son of Mary, would have felt growing up in first century Palestine. It may almost sound blasphemous to our ears but in the opinion of the people of Nazareth, Jesus was a bastard. Mary got pregnant before she was married - whether this was to Joseph or (even more scandalously) to someone else, Jesus was conceived out of wedlock and would thus always be seen as an illegitimate child. So what would this have meant to Jesus as He was growing up? How would He have been regarded by His peers?

Can you imagine growing up in a society where you were seen as being a shameful, hopeless case who will never amount to anything? I often hear it mentioned what an amazing show of humility it was that God chose to be born in a lowly stable as a poor person in an oppressed country etc, and surely His "illegitimacy" in the eyes of His people is just another aspect of the humiliation of God. But if you think about it another way, isn't it amazing that the human child Jesus managed to overcome this stigmatism and shame and rise up to become a leader of a movement of people, wisely dispensing teachings about turning the other cheek, going the extra mile, and loving our neighbors and enemies? Even if we set aside all that happened at the end of His earthly ministry, just the fact that Jesus had a ministry at all, and that it was one of peace and healing and forgiveness rather than anger and bitterness and rage, is a phenomenal achievement. Jesus had to overcome a lot more than we realize - His temptation in the desert was perhaps just the tip of the iceberg in terms of the struggles He had been through prior to His baptism and ministry - thinking about Him in this way just makes me respect and appreciate and love and admire Him even more. He willingly chose to endure all this for the sake of our lost world, for the sake of people like me.

I just want to mention briefly one other idea I had. As incredible as it was that He survived intact a childhood of illegitimacy and scorn, is it possible that Jesus was aided through this not just through His relationship with the Father or a sense of mission, but also through the positive influence and love of His parents? Not only Mary, but also His adoptive father Joseph, one of the unsung heroes of the Bible I think. Joseph who loved Mary enough to still marry her even after she got pregnant while they were betrothed, who loved enough to take her child as his own, and to care for and protect this little family, even to the point of fleeing to a foreign land. Joseph whose love and faith enabled him to believe the promises of God even though he himself got no earthly reward (as far as we know) and who perhaps would have shared in some of the ridicule and shame of his wife and child. What a great role model Joseph must have been for the young Jesus, who not only had an almighty loving Father in heaven, but a pretty amazing earthly father too.

[Currently playing on my IPod: Unwell by Matchbox 20]

Only in America

Welcome to the world of weird christian marketing. I wonder if anyone buys this stuff but at only $1 each this bargain is irresistable. Check it out here: http://in-souls.com/index2.html

Where's my sock?

If this plaintive cry has ever been heard in your home, then it may be consoling to know that a website has been dedicated to all those single missing socks. Here it is: http://www.funbureau.com/

[Currently playing on my IPod: Let The Day Begin by The Call]

Surrendered Trust

What would happen in our lives if when in times of decision, we chose to concern ourselves with obedience that comes through relationship with God and knowing His word rather than striving to reveal for God His "perfect and divine will"?

What would happen if instead of fretting, we chose to trust God even when heaven may appear silent and take a step forward into what looks to be the way ahead? Do you believe that our God is able to direct or even redirect your steps?

In the book of James and in chapter 1, James encourages the church to live lives that are shaped out of God's Word. The Message reads "So throw all spoiled virtue and cancerous evil in the garbage. In simple humility, let our gardener, God, landscape you with the Word, making a salvation garden of your life." It goes on to say "But whoever catches a glimpse of the revealed counsel of God (the free life!) even out of the corner of his eye, and sticks with it, is not a distracted scatterbrain but a man or woman of action. That person will find delight and affirmation in the action." (Jas 1:25)

After praying all night, Jesus, in Luke 6:12-16, chose twelve disciples and designated the apostles. We learn from Jesus' example that after committing our circumstances to the Lord and waiting on Him, there will come a time when you and I are faced with the need to make decisions. George Moore said "The difficulty in life is the choice". Fulton J Sheen said "Nature gives man corn but he must grind it; God gives man a will but he must make the right choices".

Sometimes I seek God and pray and ask Him to show me what He wants. Sometimes I pray for a sign and sometimes I feel that I should simply be in tune with God's Holy Spirit and knowingly walk out His will. God does not intend for confusion to surround His will.

It is easier said than done to make a good decision. Let me share two things with you that I find helpful in my own life:

1) Circumstances: Recognize that God is in control of your life and will use your experiences to direct you. Consider the circumstances surrounding before you make a final decision. Think about the practicalities including the spiritual elements, the financial, the emotional, social and the physical.

2) Counsel: Take time to listen to what other respected Christians have to say. Proverbs tells us that "Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisors they succeed" (Prov 15:22).

May we choose to wait on God and trust that He will lead us and guide us into His will for our lives - lives that are truly surrendered to what God would have for us: waiting, trusting, obeying and moving forward.

[Currently playing on my IPod: Forever And A Day by Hillsong]

Seize the moment!

I have a friend who lives by a three-word philosophy: 'Seize the moment'. Just possibly, he may be the wisest man on this planet.

Too many people put off something that brings them joy just because they haven't thought about it, don't have it on their schedule, didn't know it was coming or are too rigid to depart from their routine.

I got to thinking, one day, about all those people on the Titanic who passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night in an effort to cut back.

From then on, I've tried to be a little more flexible.

How many people out there will eat at home because their spouse didn't suggest going out to dinner until after something had been thawed? Does the word 'refrigeration' mean nothing to you?

How often have your kids dropped in to talk and sat in silence while you watched Jeopardy! on television?

I cannot count the times I called my brother and said, "How about going to lunch in a half hour?" He would gasp and stammer, "I can't. I have to mow the yard... My car is dirty... I wish I had known yesterday, I had a late breakfast... It looks like rain." And, my personal favorite: "It's Monday."

Because we cram so much into our lives, we tend to schedule our headaches. We live on a sparse diet of promises we make to ourselves when all the conditions are perfect:
We'll go back and visit the grandparents when we get the babt potty-trained.
We'll entertain - when we replace the living-room carpet.
We'll go on a second honeymoon when we get two more kids out of college.

Life has a way of accelerating as we get older. The days get shorter and the list of promises to ourselves gets longer. One morning, we awaken and all we have to show for our lives is a litany of "I'm going to," "I plan on," and "Someday, when things are settled down a bit."

When anyone calls my 'seize the moment' friend, he is open to adventure and available for trips. He keeps an open mind on new ideas. His enthusiasm for life is contagious. You talk with him for five minutes and you're ready to trade your bad feet for a pair of rollerblades and skip an elevator for a bungee cord.

Last summer I took a trip to Sydney, Australia with friends from church. If I had thought about the decision to go or not for too long, I probably would have found a reason to stay home. I'm glad I went. The experience changed my life and I will never be the same.

My lips have not touched a milk-shake in several years. I love ice cream. It's just that I might as well apply it directly to my gut with a spatula and eliminate the digestive process.
The other day, I stopped the car and bought an extra large vanilla shake. If my car had hit an iceberg on the way home, I would have died happy.

Now ... go on and have a nice day. Do something you WANT to ... not something on your 'SHOULD DO' list. If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And, why are you waiting?

[Currently playing on my IPod: Everywhere I Go by The Call]

Soft drink free...so far so good

Today is my 21st day without a soft drink. The first few days were rough, but now it is no problem. I now have more energy than ever, and feel better than before. Those who know me, know that before I gave them up, I would drop like around 10:30pm, but not any longer.

[Currently playing on my IPod: Days Go By by Dirty Vegas]

Another silly game

For all you NBA wannabes out there. Click the link.


http://www.widro.com/throwpaper.html

Forgiveness Story

This is a pretty powerful story. Something that we are all called to do.

http://www.bruderhof.com/articles/Cop-and-Robber.htm?source=DailyDig

[Currently playing on my IPod: All I Need Is You by Hillsong United]

Fun little game with penguins

Click on the link below if you have a few seconds to waste. It's a fun little game with Penguins. The furthest I hit was 288.3, see if you can do better.

http://n.ethz.ch/student/mkos/pinguin.swf

**UPDATE**
-I just hit 317.1!!!

New Toy

Over the weekend I upgraded my tv and entertainment system, and it was a huge leap forward (technology-wise) for me. Previously, my tv had only one input/output...the cable connector...and that was it. Now, I have this massive 36in Sony flat screen, HDTV monster that weighs in at 238lbs!! I got a brand new cherry-wood armoire and the Bose 15 point surround sound system with sub-woofer to boot! Watching a DVD will never be the same!

[Currently playing on my IPod: Tell The World by Hillsong United]

Bulk Pickup

My fine town offers a very convenient service - bulk pickup. Every other week, in addition to normal trash pickup, they send another truck by to get items that won't fit in your trash can, such as brush, bags of leaves, and boxes.

About a year ago I had an old treadmill that I'd been trying to decide what to do with. Believe it or not, this was not a dusty, under-used treadmill, but a thoroughly worn out one. Over the past 7 years, I actually wore a hole in the belt and the engine was basically defunct. It was clearly time for it to go, but where? What do you do with a treadmill?

For the first couple of weeks, I honestly couldn't think of any good options, because I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that the trash company would never take a treadmill. As I was driving home one night, though, I saw the curbside evidence throughout the neighborhood that bulk pickup day was just around the corner. The thought slowly crossed my mind, "Maybe they would take a treadmill!" That was followed seconds later with, "Never going to happen my friend."

The next morning, I finally gave in. I called the trash company and asked, "Would you pick-up a
treadmill?"

"Sure," they said.

"Like a real treadmill? Over 5 feet long? Heavy? Lots of metal?"

"No problem."

I couldn't believe it. This was great news! I moved it out of my apartment and down to the curb (wheels are cool). But as I stood looking at it, so proud of this solution, the thought hit me - this looks awful. Can you imagine driving through a neighborhood and someone has a treadmill sitting by the curb? How embarrassing. I actually thought about moving it back until the last possible minute, so most of my neighbors wouldn't see it, but it was too much work.

When I came home later that day, it was gone! All that was left was the green grass next to the curb. If you timed it right, you never would have seen it at all.

And that's when it hit me.

This bulk pickup thing is exactly what it feels like when you've messed up. Not just a little mess up, but something you'd never want to say out loud. Have you ever done something and you thought, "There's no way God can forgive me for this? I mean, this isn't just your run-of-the-mill slip-up. This is BIG TIME. If my neighbors, friends, family knew about it, I could never look them in the eye again."

And you go on for weeks and weeks, wondering what to do with this thing you're carrying around with you, sure that you're past the point of no return. And finally, one day, you give up and say, "God, can you forgive me?"

And He says, "Sure."

And you say, "But did you hear what it is? This is BIG...HEAVY...A REAL MESS."

"No problem."

And it's gone, as if it was never there.

New State Slogans

These were so funny, I had to post them. I have no idea who wrote them, but they're hilarious:

Alabama
Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names

Alaska
11,623 Eskimos Can't Be Wrong!

Arizona
But It's A Dry Heat

Arkansas
Literacy Ain't Everything

California
By 30, Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda

Colorado
If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother

Connecticut
Like Massachusetts, Only The Kennedy's Don't Own It Yet

Delaware
We Really Do Like The Chemicals In Our Water

Florida
Ask Us About Our Grandkids

Georgia
We Put The 'Fun' In Fundamentalist Extremism

Hawaii
Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death To Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)

Idaho
More Than Just Potatoes ... Well Okay, We're Not, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good

Illinois
Please Don't Pronounce the 'S'

Indiana
Two Billion Years Tidal Wave Free

Iowa
We Do Amazing Things With Corn

Kansas
First Of The Rectangle States

Kentucky
Yes, We Have Electricity

Louisiana
We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign

Maine
We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster

Maryland
If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It

Massachusetts
Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)

Michigan
First Line Of Defense From The Canadians

Minnesota
10,000 Lakes ... And 10,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes

Mississippi
Come And Feel Better About Your Own State

Missouri
Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars At Work

Montana
Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, And Very Little Else

Nebraska
Ask About Our State Motto Contest

New Hampshire
Go Away And Leave Us Alone

New Mexico
Lizards Make Excellent Pets

New York
You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To An Attorney...

North Carolina
Tobacco Is A Vegetable

North Dakota
We Really Are One Of The 50 States!

Ohio
At Least We're Not Michigan

Oklahoma
Like The Play, Only No Singing

Oregon
Spotted Owl... It's What's For Dinner

Pennsylvania
Cook With Coal

Rhode Island
We're Not REALLY An Island

South Carolina
Remember The Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender

South Dakota
Closer Than North Dakota

Tennessee
The Educashun State

Texas
Si, Hablo Ingles (Yes, I Speak English)

Utah
Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus

Vermont
Yep

Virginia
Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?

Washington
Help! We're Overrun By Nerds And Slackers!

Washington, D.C.
Wanna Be Mayor?

West Virginia
One Big Happy Family ... Really!

Wisconsin
Come Cut The Cheese

The Bible in 30 seconds

God made.
Adam bit.
Noah arked.
Abraham split.
Joseph ruled.
Jacob fooled.
Bush talked.
Moses balked.
Pharaoh plagued.
People walked.
Sea divided.
Tablets guided.
Promise landed.
Saul freaked.
David peeked.
Prophets warned.
Jesus born.
God walked.
Love talked.
Anger crucified.
Hope died.
Love rose.
Spirit flamed.
Word spread.
God remained!

Star Wars Episode III- Final Verdict

So we saw Star Wars Episode III yesterday afternoon and it was awesome. I'm sure hard core fans of the original trilogy would still rate it below those films but for me it was at least on a par with them and certainly eclipsed the first two episodes. The action in this movie was almost unrelenting, with a sense of urgency and building climax that was maintained throughout the story. And the scale of the battles, the villains, the duels and the personal drama was far above anything we've seen in Star Wars before. And in the midst of all this, George Lucas managed to weave enough in political, religious, and philosophical themes to keep any person looking for a deeper side to the film happy. This was always going to be the movie to tie up all the loose ends and bridge the two trilogies, and it was amazing how effortlessly it all just fell into place. None of the plot seemed contrived or forced to make it fit the original trilogy - it really for the first time looks like this was the story that was there in the beginning 30 years ago, before any of these movies were made, rather than simply a prequel that was added on later. The final scenes of the movie flow seamlessly into "A New Hope" - the title of which now really genuinely makes perfect sense.

The acting was a touch above what we've seen in the last two movies, and although the Anakin-Padme romantic dialogue was a bit syrupy, the romance itself was more like a Shakespearean tragedy. Hayden Christiansen did fairly well as Anakin, but the actor who truly shone was once again Ewan McGregor as Obi-Wan Kenobi. Like Harrison Ford as Han Solo in the original trilogy, McGregor is the heart and soul of the prequel series, especially in this movie where he gives a brilliant performance. In fact I'd probably say he's one of the best big screen actors going around today full stop.

So see the movie. If you're already a Star Wars fan I don't need to tell you this, but if you found the last two movies disappointing, hopefully Lucas has redeemed himself, and the series, with this amazing movie. A perfect climactic close to the films that have helped define a generation.

[Currently playing in my IPod: Time and Space by Groove Armada]

Think you know everything?

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.

There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.

A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

There are more chickens than people in the world.

Two-thirds of the world's eggplant is grown in New Jersey.

The longest one-syllable word in the English language is 'screeched'.

All of the clocks in the movie Pulp Fiction are stuck on 4:20.

No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.

'Dreamt' is the only English word that ends in the letters 'mt'.

All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.

Almonds are a member of the peach family.

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.

Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable.

There are only four words in the English language which end in 'dous': tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.

Los Angeles' full name is 'El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora la Reina de los Angeles de Porciuncula'.

A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.

In most advertisements, the time displayed on a watch is 10:10.

Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.

The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank Capra's It's a Wonderful Life.

A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.

A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.

A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.

It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

The giant squid has the largest eyes in the world.

In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed to speak.

The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket.

The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.

There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball.

'Stewardesses' is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand.

...now you know everything

Time with God

The enemy tries so hard to get Christians to be religious. If he can sink men's mind into habit, he will prevent his heart from engaging God.

It has always fascinated me that those who speak so passionately about the differences in the Body of Christ would turn around and prescribe the same time and relationship with God to everyone. Could it be our best times with God come as unexpected experiences throughout our lives?

Don't hear me wrong here, I'm not saying avoid spending regular time with God - I'm just saying dump your agenda when you do - plan to take time, but don't plan what will happen during that time. I've found that, when I set aside this kind of unplanned time for God, He fills it differently - miraculously - every day.

Sometimes I spend long periods of time in the Bible - others I don't even touch it. Sometimes I pray and pray - others I just listen to the silence and open my spirit to His guidance. Regardless of what happens during this time, it focuses my soul for the day.

[Currently playing on my IPod: Wash Away by Vertical Horizon]

1-800-ASK-KEITH

OK, here's how this new feature of my blog works. I've joked with my friends for years about the fact that people should call me before they make decisions in their lives.

Sometimes it's over trivial things--like whether or not someone should have selected the outfit they are wearing. Sometimes it's over bigger things--like whether or not someone is a good fit for the job they're pursuing. Sometimes it's over stuff that makes the news. That includes items that are legitimately newsworthy and items that wouldn't even qualify for the 10:00 pm newscast on Dallas television.

Well, here's the beauty of blogging--whether someone wants my opinion or not, I can offer it. You can choose to agree with it or not, but it's still my opinion and I can post whatever I want. After all, it's my blog.

So, without any further delay, here's the first (and maybe last) edition of 1-800-ASK-KEITH. These are the people that should have called me first this week:

Cameron Diaz -- You can do better than Justin Timberlake. Don't marry him.

Phil Jackson -- Take the job with Cleveland. You'll have the chance to coach one of the greatest basketball players of all time, and you'll get the opportunity to build a program from the ground up.

W. -- It's a good thing when the first lady has a chance to say what's on her mind. People like that.

NHL-- Come to an agreement soon, stop being so greedy. You are not the NFL.

Simply the Truth: Galatians 2:19-20

"I tried keeping rules and working my head off to please God, and it didn't work. So I quit being a 'law man' so that I could be God's man. Christ's life showed me how, and enabled me to do it. I identified myself completely with him. Indeed, I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not 'mine,' but it is lived by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I am not going to go back on that."

Galatians 2:19-20 (The Message)

God-sized dreams

How powerfully could the Spirit move through our lives, families and ministries if we all started out dreaming above and beyond what we thought ourselves capable of doing? How rich would our lives be?

Too many times I find myself dreaming Keith-sized dreams; and God always takes them beyond that to greater things. But what if I dreamed God-sized dreams and watched where He took those? Wow!!

[Currently playing on my IPod: Captivate Me by Delirious?]

Character- A leader worth following

Sometimes I feel like God has got the wrong guy. It is likely that God will use all of us in areas beyond what our character seems ready for. Too often the temptation is to cover our flaws, hoping they are as elusive to others as we pretend they are to ourselves.

The problem here, is that character is personal, but it is not private. Eventually the truth comes out. I think it’s interesting that we think God put us in our position for the good of a task, rather than the good of His Spirit in us. Could it be our character is stretched not so we can cover it and accomplish what we have been given, but so we can have it transformed through the journey the Spirit is leading us on? Could it be the very things we are struggling with are they keys we are searching for to unlock what God has called us to do?

I think so often we fail in accomplishing the vision God has given us, not because of a lack of competence, but because of our disinterest in developing our character as priority before accomplishing the vision. You can lead without character. But character is what makes you a leader worth following. We are always one decision, one word, one reaction away from damaging what has taken years to develop.

Those who choose to follow you want you to be a leader worth following. They will judge you not so much for where you led them, but how you led them. Their stories will always include their personal estimation of you as a person, not just your leadership skills. The truth is that those who choose to follow you will expect more from you by way of character than they expect from themselves.

[Currently playing on my IPod: Spin by Lifehouse]

Good exercise and good food

I received this from a friend this morning about health and eating. It's hilarious....

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body and you have body fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!. Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO .. Cocoa beans ... another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!

Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets and remember, "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Coca Cola in one hand - hamburger in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming - WOO HOO! What a Ride!"

Mysteries of the universe

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are dead?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

What is the speed of darkness?

If you send someone 'Styrofoam', how do you pack it?

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on bigger suitcases?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up about every couple hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

[Currently playing on my IPod: Elevation by U2]

Nothing Says You Care Like Cheap Toilet Paper

Okay, I admit it. I'm from Texas and sarcasm is my preferred form of humor. But that is exactly what I thought when I went to my gym this morning and went into the bathroom. The toilet paper had definitley been downgraded by a bean counter who cared more about the money than the customer who might actually have to use the toilet paper he downgraded.

Now, trust me, I'm going somewhere with this. In the world of customer care, the quickest test of customer care in any establishment is . . . the bathroom/restroom facilities. Why? Because restooms are a cost center, not a revenue center. In other words, the only reason anyone would ever spend money on restoom facilities (other than having a basic toilet and sink combo) is because they actually care.

Don't believe me? Do your own investigation. Go to a nice restaurant, then a cheap one. Go to a nice hotel, then a cheap one. Go to a nice church, then a cheap one. It really doesn't matter. If someone is willing to spend money on nice bathroom fixtures, nice lighting, nice decorations and nice toilet paper, then they care about you—not just your wallet and their bottom line.

So, how about you? What do your bathroom facilities say about you or your church? Is it time to upgrade to a nicer toilet paper and to let your bean counter know that you won't sacrifice on your commitment to excellence? I hope so.

[Currently playing on my IPod: Galaxy Bounce by The Chemical Brothers]

Two Kinds of People

"There are only two kinds of people in the end: those who say to God, "Thy will be done," and those to whom God says, in the end, "Thy will be done." All that are in Hell, choose it. Without that self-choice there could be no Hell. No soul that seriously and constantly desires joy will ever miss it. Those who seek find. To those who knock it is opened." ~C. S. Lewis - The Great Divorce

[Currently playing on my IPod- Gotta Get Thru This by Daniel Beddingfield]

Identity Crisis...

Why do we have an identify crisis?
1. We look at who we are and not at who He is
2. When we receive correction from God & others we become insecure
3. Other peoples opinions
4. We lack confidence

When your identity is in Christ…
1. We don’t need to tear others down to build ourselves up
2. You can live with an inner conviction not an outer toughness
3. Gifted and successful people are not a threat
4. You take a MESS and turn it into a MESSAGE!

Peter, ‘You are Christ the Son of the Living God’ - When Peter knew who Jesus was he knew who he was. Simon became Peter.We need to look into the mirror of God’s word to discover our true identity.(2 Corinthians 5:17) - A new creation(Galatians 2:20) - I no longer live, but Christ lives in me(Job 3:10) - Let the weak say I am strong!

Darth Vader's blog

Ever wondered what it's like to be a Dark Lord of the Sith? Ever wanted to see the world through the tinted visor of a shiny black helmet? If you have, then you might want to take a look at Darth Vader's Blog, The Darth Side: Memoirs of a Monster

[Currently playing on my IPod: Holiday in My Head by SmashMouth]

American Idol shocker

Each week on American Idol, just when you think one of the contestants has dug themselves into a very deep hole, they get spared. Case in point, last night, Scott & Anthony were both horrid while Constantaine was merely ok, not great, but not horrible either. What happens? The worst performer of the night (in my humble opinion,and Simon's...Scott) was in the top 3 and Constanaine was sentg packing. It seems as if America is bent on voting in the worst singer as the next "American Idol".

[Currently playing on my IPod: More Than Life by Hillsong]

The loss of monarchy

Yesterday while sitting in the park after lunch, I was thinking how we may have lost something with the decline of monarchy in our world. Now don't get me wrong I'm not an ardent monarchist... that debate is not what this post is about.

What I was thinking is that in comparison to previous generations where there was a strong, respected monarchy, we are missing out on something. There is very little grandeur or majesty in modern Western society. We can no longer relate so well to what it is to revere a monarch and perhaps this detracts from our worship of God.

In times gone by the trappings and regalia and status of the King helped provide an earthly image of the way in which humanity related to the heavenly King. The monarch in those days was someone held in such high regard, put on such a height that common folk could never aspire to reach. So the people would have an idea of how to relate to a sovereign all powerful God.

Conversely, the thought of a King who would become one of them, befriend them, and even die for them, would have seemed all the more incredible and amazing to these people than it would to us with our modern view that all humans are equal.

It seems to be now that we no longer have the experience/knowledge of what it means to relate to an earthly monarch, we may have lost a valuable way of comprehending what it means to worship God. Although we sing about God "our King" still, does that phrase have any real meaning to us anymore?

"Amazing Love, how can it be, that you my King would die for me?"

[Currently playng on my IPod: Shaking The Tree by Peter Gabriel]

Top of the 90's?

I was thinking about music yesterday - that it's not all that easy to select who might be the greatest band of the nineties. In my mind the preceeding decades each have an obvious candidate (though I'm sure others may disagree)...

50s - Elvis Presley
60s - The Beatles
70s - Led Zeppelin
80s - U2

For the nineties I found it harder to pick just one band. I could quite easily choose a top 5, and from that narrow it down to 2 or 3, but found it very hard to narrow it down to just 1.

My top 5 would be Pearl Jam, Radiohead, Smashing Pumpkins, No Noubt and REM. All of these bands started out in the early 90s (except REM) and all had some degree of longevity. I can't really think of any really stand-out bands that surfaced in the latter half of the 90s. All of these bands have their own unique sound as well which I think is an important factor - you instantly know it's them when you hear one of their songs.

If I had to pick, I would probably go with Radiohead just simply because of their massive popularity and influence without really much airplay. I obviously exlcuded what many consider to be the best band of the era (Nirvana) but to me they are not that creative or original.

What do you think?

[Currently playing on my IPod: Everywhere I Go by The Call]

A bit of cultcha (culture)!

* Q: What do bullet-proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
A: All invented by women.

* Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A: Honey.

* Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes, the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase 'goodnight, sleep tight'.

* It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month or what we know today as the honeymoon.

* Last but not least: In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled Gentlemen Only, Ladies Forbidden and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

[Currently playing on my IPod: Light by Hillsong United]

Enhanced awareness and Life in the Bubble

It's funny how you don't notice something until you start thinking about it yourself, or, conversely, once you are in the market for something or pondering something you begin to see it everywhere. For example, you never notice how many laptops there are about the place until you are looking to buy one yourself, and then you see them everywhere. Or you never notice how many pregnant people there are in the shops until someone in your family is pregnant. Or you suddenly start to see how many 4WDs there are on the road when you are looking at buying one.

Something like that happened to me this morning. I read an article in the Dallas Morning News today that said this:

"Even without the white wires you can tell who they are. They walk down the street in their own MP3 cocoon, bumping into others, deaf to small social cues, shutting out anyone not in their bubble."

And then, while walking around in the city this morning from the train to my office, it seemed that every 3rd person had white wires trailing down from their ears, locked inside their MP3 cocoon. I'd never seen so many people with earphones before.

Of course I must admit that it wasn't just the Dallas Morning News article that made me so acutely aware of the iPodders, it was more the fact that I myself was amongst them, white wires leading from my ears down to that magical white device in my bag, surrounded by people, but in my own little bubble of private sound. And I felt a strange sense of kindred with those other coccooned ones as well, knowing that we shared the same experience of isolation in public - very weird.

[Currently playing on my IPod: Vertigo by U2]

Dual Disc

Bruce Sprinsgteen's new album is being released as a Dual Disc format with normal CD audio on one side and then DVD video on the other side. I'm surprised it took them this long to come up with this idea since double sided DVDs have been around for ages.

The only concern I have is that if this becomes widespread what will happen to the traditional concept of a music album?? - will video content become obligatory and thus will music artists end up being made more and more into video/movie stars?

Also why did we never see double sided audio CDs? For many years we've been getting double albums with 2 CDs in the one case. If this sort of thing is possible why did no-one ever invent a double sided CD, or if they did, why didn't it take off?

[Currently playing on my IPod: Still Here by Vertical Horizon]

The curse of consumerism

This quote from Brian McLaren about consumerism vs contemplation, captured an idea that's been nagging at the edges of my consciousness for a long time :

"one acquires more and more things without taking the

time to ever see and know them, and thus one never truly

enjoys them. One has without truly having. The consumer

is right - there is pleasure to be had in good things, a

sacred and almost unspeakable pleasure, but the

consumer wrongly thinks that one finds this pleasure by

having more and more possessions instead of possessing

them more truly through grateful contemplation."

I know I'm a victim of this trap - caught in a cycle of materialism and acquisition, without really taking the time to savour the things which I am lucky enough to acquire.

For me the clearest example of this is music. When I was in my teens and had no money, when I was able to save and buy a CD it was a big deal to me - I'd listen to that CD over and over again so that I would know much of it by heart (and that includes some pretty crappy CDs now that I look back) - nowadays I probably buy more CDs, but get to listen to them once or twice while doing something else at the same time (like driving, or reading, or computer stuff) so I never really get to know and savor the good thing that I have got. And the same goes for many other things in my materially blessed existence. Perhaps there is something to be said for a more ascetic, contemplative lifestyle, where one can take the time to truly appreciate and contemplate the simple things which God has provided for us...

Sharing Life with God

As I was driving to mid-week church yesterday, I had some interesting insights about how God wants us to share our daily lives with him. I thought it was quite powerful so I stopped and scribbled some of it down.

Below is an extended version of what I've been thinking about :

Imagine you are an artist, and you've produced a masterpiece. How do you think you would get the most satisfaction and pleasure out of your art? I'd suggest that it would be when standing alongside someone else who is admiring and appreciating what you have created. Or put yourself in the place of a master-chef (or home cooking enthusiast), producing a seven course culinary treat. Which do you think you would prefer - to receive a cursory "Thanks. The food was good" at the end, or to sit down alongside the diners and watch as they savour the delicious meal? To see the delighted reaction on their faces as they taste each new piece of food, and to hear their satisfied "mmmm's" as they eat and nod their appreciation for what you have prepared for them.

Finally, imagine you are an expert gardener (this is a big stretch of the imagination for me). You have spent years crafting a wonderful garden, carefully selecting and planting each tree and flower, positioning them exactly where you want according to your master plan. You include paths and fish-ponds and all sorts of other special features which make this garden a wonderful place to explore. Now certainly after all this time and work, you yourself would be able to get immense pleasure from this garden, but don't you think this would be amplified even more by walking through it with another, sharing in their surprise and enjoyment of what you have built.

Now take the big step of trying to put yourself in God's shoes for a moment. It's impossible for us to comprehend just what it's like to be God, to have an constant awareness of everything in the vastness of the created universe, simultaneously being in tune with huge supernovae many billions of light-years away and the movement of a single bacterium here on earth. And of course not forgetting that He is also interested in every moment of every life of the six billion or so humans on this planet of ours. That kind of existence that God has is just too mind-blowing for our little human brains to even start to understand.

But on a simpler level God can be compared to the artist, the chef, and the gardener I mentioned earlier. He has created something amazing, and part of His reason for creating it is for us to enjoy and appreciate it, along with him. And part of his reason for creating us is so that there is someone else to enjoy all that he has made.

If we look at Genesis chapter 1, after God completes each step in the creation of the world, we see the line "and God saw that it was good" It's almost like an artist stepping back from his canvas and nodding his approval. But what artist would want to paint a picture that no-one sees? And what chef would create a meal that only she or he gets to eat? So God moves on from there to create humans, beings in the image of God, who can share in his appreciation and enjoyment of creation. He puts man and woman in His garden, where He walks with them and participates as they explore his creation, discovering animals and putting names to them. In the perfect world God shares in the life of his people, walking alongside them and getting pleasure from their enjoyment of his world.

Now let's switch metaphors to that of a parent with a child (there's no metaphor that can adequately encompass all the complexities of a relationship with God, so using multiple ones is the best we can do). Parents long to be able to share in the lives of their children. It's an amazing feeling in the heart of a parent watching as your child explores and learns about the world that we've brought them into. But as children grow, often the amount of their lives that they share with their parents decreases. The inevitable grunt of "nothing" in answer to the question "what did you do at school today?" As they grow up through childhood and adolescence the child becomes more and more independant and the parents can only share in that child's life to the extent that the child chooses to let the parents in.

And our relationship with God is similar to this. He longs to be a part of our lives and share with us as we walk through the world which he created for us, but only does so to the extent that we choose to let him in. And there's a wide variation in people's responses here. Some are like a child who leaves home at the earliest opportunity, going off and living their life without maintaining any contact with God, even to the point that they deny his very existence. And for these people God, like the father of the prodigal son, patiently waits against the day that they choose to come home into his loving arms. Even when they are far from Him, he still maintains his love for them, although he grieves that he is not invited to share in their lives.

Other people acknowledge their parents, and if asked would say they are indeed thankful for all that their parents have done for them, but then as they 'grow up' they go off and live their own busy lives, independantly and without much contact with their parents, aside from the occaisional visit because of guilt or a sense of duty. Probably a great majority of us Christians relate to God in this manner most of the time. We send up prayers to him occaisionally, even every day, and go to church on Sunday and maybe do other church activities, but for 95% or more of our waking time, we don't give God a second thought.

I think God wants something better for us than this. I don't think he wants to be like the cook (or the parent) who creates a sumptious meal only to get a cursory "thanks, that was nice" in response at the end. I think God wants to share with us as we consume every morsel of the great feast of life that he has prepared for us. He wants to walk alongside us as we stroll through his garden, and he wants to share with us the highs and lows of 'growing up' rather than being a distant, unappreciated parent. And the thing with God is that this is actually possible. Unlike a human parent, God is always present at our side. He doesn't just live up in the sky in heaven so we can call up to Him once in a while - rather his existence fills the universe and He is actually proximate to us wherever we go.

So prayer doesn't need to be like a letter to someone in the sky, or an email, or even like a phone-call (which seems to me to be the metaphor most of us have of prayer - like God's waiting on the end of the line - we pick up the phone and talk to him in the morning and hang up when we are finished, and he sits there waiting until we decide to phone him again - there actually was a very geeky 50s song called 'Royal Telephone' which captured this picture nicely). Rather prayer is talking to a friend who is right there beside us, sitting next to us on the couch or in the car, or in our office or where-ever we are. And if we properly appreciate this metaphor for prayer, then we can truly begin to share every moment of our lives with him, the ever-present friend who walks beside us through the garden of life which he has created.

A similar concept is expressed by Brother Lawrence, a Catholic monk from a few hundred years ago, in a book called "Practicing the Presence of God." Brother Lawrence saw life and prayer as a continual conversation with God, throughout every moment of every day of his life. And this truly is the way in which God wants to share our lives with us. He wants to enjoy his creation through my eyes my life, to savour it with me and share in it's delights. Just as Jesus invites us to share in his body and his blood in the communion supper, we should invite him to share in our body and blood and accompany us through life. Communion is not just a symbol of death and sacrifice - it is also a symbol of a life shared. God came down to share his life with us, and he wants us to share ours with him.

The challenge for us is to consider how we can invite God to share in our daily life, and how we can be more aware of his continual presence at our side. This is certainly not an easy habit or mindset to get into, but I think it is what God wants for us and will allow us to truly experience life as He originally intended.

Generous lives

I spent a few minutes this morning meditating on Proverbs 11:25, which says:

A generous man will prosper;
He who refreshes others will himself be refreshed.

This verse is profoundly challenging to me because I find I don't naturally lead a "generous" life. I think it's also interesting that the link is drawn between people who live generously and the observation that those around them are refreshed.

I found myself asking, are people refreshed when they have been with me? Are they refreshed by my speech? My life?

What do you think?
- What does it mean to lead a generous life?

-How can we, as leaders, foster environments where generous people refresh non-Christians and worshippers when they come into our communities?

Happy Birthday McDonald's

McDonald's is 50 years old this week.

Well, sort of. Dick and Mac McDonald opened their first drive-through, in San Bernardino, California, in 1948.

The birthday being marked today was the result of a meeting the brothers had with a milkshake-mixer salesman called Ray Kroc, six years later.

Mr Kroc was the creator of McDonald's unique way of doing business. "What Henry Ford did for cars, McDonald's did for burgers," says John Williamson of branding agency Wolff Olins.

This demanded intense attention to detail. In 1961, for example, Mr Kroc opened Hamburger University, granting bachelor degrees in hamburgerology.

It's now in 121 countries, more than half of which were added during the 1990s.

FACT - no two countries with a McDonald's presence have ever gone to war.

Dignity

One of the things that I admire about the Saviour, was his discipline, exercised under pressure. Under fire. Under injustice.

From time to time I guess, we all feel that we are being mocked, belittled or persecuted to varying degrees. In our humanity, we will do it to others. We question their motives, although in Truth, we do not really know them.

Too often I fail.

In a tempest, my fast and hard words of anger or wit fired at an antagonist to cut straight to their very core with the objective of bittersweetly evening up the score.

As I grow older and (hopefully) wiser (a result of my own mistakes), I am more frequently choosing silence over an unbridled tongue. Choosing restraint over fiery passion.

And in this time of percieved weakness, electing to abdicate ownership of a certain victory, there one finds true strength and comfort in silence. Leaving vengence to serendipity and ultimately to the Father.

....And of course it's never a good idea to dignify a fool with a response.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
"A man of knowledge uses words with restraint, and a man
of understanding is even-tempered;
Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent,
and discerning if he holds his tongue".-Proverbs 17:27-28

Blah

I slept horribly Saturday night. I left early from having pizza and watching a movie with my hometeam members, so I could get plenty of sleep for my busy Sunday. For some reason a fever hit me right after I got home, and I was miserable all night. I felt de-energized all of yesterday as a result, then a migraine came on last night around 8pm. Thankfully all of that has passed, and I am doing a lot better. Wonder what brought it all on?

Free Agent

I just registered for the Fellowship Church volleyball league as a free agent. That means I have no clue who's team I will be playing on, but I kind of like that since it will give me the opportunity to meet some new people. League play begins on May 19th and goes all the way until Sept. 26th! It will be a long, and fun season!

Been thinking

When God created the universe, He spoke it into existence. Some even say He sang it into existence. The very sound of God's voice created everything that is. He spangled stars over blackness like diamonds on velvet.
But, when He created us, His children, His image, He got His hands dirty. He dug His fingers into the clay and formed us from the earth. Kneeling down over the man-formed mound of dirt, God placed His lips on Adam's and breathed life into him. "And man became a living soul."

Our anthropology doesn't start with 'the Fall' - it starts with 'a Kiss'. We are the descendants of Adam. We are God's very image walking around on legs... all of us. The good, the bad and the ugly... His image!
The problem is, we've been infected with a virus called sin and that virus has been passed down from generation to generation. But our Heavenly Father has found the cure and delivered it Himself... a blood transfusion. His blood. It was the only way He could reconcile His creation back to Himself.

I've heard well-meaning preachers raise their voices (usually when their outline got weak), pound on pulpits (usually when a deacon fell asleep) and proclaim that we are "dirty, low-down, good-for-nothing, sinners." I believe the message I heard (more from their tone than their words) was that I was sin itself - the sin that easily beset me was who I was. Yes, I am a sinner but I am NOT sin. And neither are you. We are the image of God. Broken? Yes. But His image, nonetheless. And He didn't think we were 'good-for-nothing', in fact, He sent the best He had to rescue us. He came Himself. "He thought it not robbery." He felt good about the deal: His life for ours.

I believe inside the DNA of every human there is something that remembers Eden. A faint recollection of footsteps crushing leaves beneath them in the cool of the day... our hearts jumping for joy as we ran to our Father. He always came in the cool of the day. You could count on it. He never missed. He would throw us in the air and catch us (like parents have been doing with their children ever since.) He walked with us and talked with us. Then, we were infected. We sinned. All of a sudden, we knew we were naked. We felt ashamed.

After we sinned, He still came in the cool of the day. We hid. But He still came. He didn't come because of our goodness, or because of our sinfulness. He came because we were His.

There's an ache inside of me that longs for Eden. And, every now and then, something will remind me of Home. It's almost like a 'thin place' - where the veil between this life and the 'other side' almost become one - the dark glass (that Paul referred to) clears for a second. And, for a brief moment, things make sense.

Something tells me our greatest days are ahead. And, it's going to be wonderful... beyond comprehension. A thousand Walt Disney's couldn't imagine it. I know it's there. I know it's real. I know it's Home. And everything will be clear. Perfectly clear. Where we're headed is even better than Eden. It's The New Jerusalem. Where, once again, we will hear His footsteps in the cool of the day. The God who came for us... walked with us... delivered us... and brought us back Home.

Charles Schultz Philosophy

You don't actually have to take the quiz. Just read this straight through, and you'll get the point that it is trying to make!

Take this quiz:
1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.
2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.
3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America contest.
4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.
5. Name the last six Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.
6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.

How did you do?

The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. These are no second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.

Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:
1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.
2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.
3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.
4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.
5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.
6. Name six heroes whose stories have inspired you.

Easier?

The lesson: The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most credentials, the most money or the most awards. They are the ones that care.

"Don't worry about the world coming to an end today.
It's already tomorrow in Australia."- Charles Schultz

Pick Me! Pick Me!

Remember the scene from Shrek where Donkey is jumping up and down shouting....pick me, pick me!

Here’s a great poem written by a schoolboy…

When we pick teams in the playground
Whatever the game might be
There’s always somebody left till last
And it’s usually me.

I stand there looking hopeful
And tapping myself on the chest
But the captains pick the others first
Starting of course with the best.

Maybe if teams were sometimes picked
Starting with the worst
Once in his life a boy like me
Could end up being first

The reality is that many of us have never left the playground, we still secretly believe that God will only love us when we do well.

The mind-blowing concept of grace – God’s unmerited favor towards us – is hard for us to grasp in a society so used to earning love and acceptance.

Because of God’s amazing grace we’re on the team! First name on the team roster!!!!

The Final Analysis

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered.
Forgive them, anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.
Be kind, anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies.
Succeed, anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you.
Be honest and frank, anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight.
Build, anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, there may be jealousy.
Be happy, anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow.
Do good, anyway.

Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough.
Give the world the best you've got, anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God.
It was never between you and them, anyway.

Eight of the original Ten Paradoxical Commandments by Kent M. Keith, 1968. Adopted by Mother Teresa and posted on the wall of a children's home in Calcutta

New Toy

Just picked up the new Nokia 3220 on Thursday. It's the first phone that I've ever had with the capability of taking video. Some of the ring tones are ridiculously loud. I was in the mall Saturday and had the phone set to the "Fire Alarm" ring tone. A call came in, and I kid you not, everyone within a 50 foot radius stopped dead in their tracks. Needless to say, I don't think I'll be able to have the phone set to that particular ring tone while I'm at the office...mass chaos could result!

Lessons from Mother

My mother taught me RELIGION:
"You better pray that it will come out of the carpet."

My mother taught me TIME TRAVEL:
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

My mother taught me REASON:
"Because I said so, that's why."

My mother taught me LOGIC:
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

My mother taught me FORESIGHT:
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

My mother taught me IRONY:
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS:
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM:
"Will you 'look' at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

My mother taught me about STAMINA:
"You'll sit there 'till all that spinach is finished."

My mother taught me about WEATHER:
"It looks as if a tornado swept through your room."

My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS:
"If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen THEN?"

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY:
"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times - Don't exaggerate!!!"

My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE:
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION:
"Stop acting like your father!"

My mother taught me about ENVY:
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"

My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION:
"Just wait until we get home."

My Mother taught me about RECEIVING:
"You are going to get it when we get home!"

My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE:
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD:
"If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job."

My Mother taught me ESP:
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you're cold?"

My Mother taught me HUMOR:
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT:
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

My Mother taught me about SEX:
"How do you think you got here?"

My Mother taught me about GENETICS:
"You're just like your father."

My Mother taught me about my ROOTS:
"Do you think you were born in a barn?"

My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE:
"When you get to be my age, you will understand."

And...My Mother taught me about JUSTICE:
"One day you'll have kids... and I hope they turn out just like you!"

How to Start a Blog

Many of my friends have asked me what a blog is and how do I start one.

Are you thinking about starting a blog? Maybe you have started down that path, but pulled back because it is too confusing. Maybe you think you need to have some technical skills?

Mike Hyatt wrote the best “How To” post about starting a blog that I have ever read. If you are thinking about starting a blog, this is your one stop shop. Mike Hyatt is the head of Thomas Nelson Publishers, one of the big guns in Christian publishing. Here's the link:

http://michaelhyatt.blogs.com/fromwhereisit/2005/04/how_to_start_a_.html

Must be doing something right

The following is a post from my friend's blog about Fellowship Church in Grapevine, Texas. I used to sing here on the praise team, and it's awesome to see how many people were reached...anyway here's the post:

Now that the cat has been publicly let out of the bag about Fellowship Easter numbers I can put them out on my site. I have been peppered with emails asking what our numbers were, so here it is!

Without a doubt, Easter and Christmas are our two biggest weekends at FC. This year for Easter we had many cards stacked against us. 1) Spring Break and 2) Horrible weather. Two scenarios that were not good for us. However, it turned out great. God showed up in a great way and made the very best of a potentially bad situation. Just for you to know, we had a total of 18 services over our 4 campuses over 3 days. Crazy! Here is how the numbers break down.

Alliance: 1,415 (Easter Sunday was the grand opening for this satellite)
Uptown: 1,345
Plano: 3,199
Grapevine: 28,542
Adding up to a grand total of 34,501

Yes, 34k is a lot of people, but the amazing thing to look at is the incredible turn out at our satellite campuses. We are praying that this is a launching pad for us to reach those communities.

Also, it is very important for us and everyone to remember that behind each and every number is a person. We now are completely focused on connecting and reaching those people and getting them involved in the life of FC.

Advice Taken

It looks like the Monterrey Bay Aquarium took my advice. I guess my Marine Biology degree is good for something. Here's the link to the article http://www.cnn.com/2005/TECH/science/03/31/shark.release.reut/index.html